broternia:
i hate math tests because all throughout the chapter it’s like really easy shit and then you think you’ve got it and then the test is like
if i throw a triangle out of a car and the car is going 20 mph and wind resistance is a thing that exists, how many cupcakes can pedro buy with one human soul
firelightwaltz:
zero points if you guess jo is talking to/abt mulder and/or scully
ZERO. POINTS.
LOOK I CAN’T HELP THAT FOLKLORE TURNS ME ON
tokyograndpa:
Ways you can tell you’re obsessed with British Isles folktales and ballads:
- ship Lady Margaret and Sweet William in whatever story in whatever form
- ship Janet and Tamlin that girl’s a bamf
- never go swimming with anyone or go near water
- either you will drown or be drowned or your lover will have drowned
- if it’s been seven years your lover is dead
- if your lover shows up at your door at midnight do not go with him
- he is a ghost
- he is a fucking dead ghost he died in the war you’ve been waiting for nothing congrats
- robin hood motherfuckers yeah
- trees are awesome but omg escaping into a wood is dangerous shit
- your houseguest is either a ghost or the devil
- their horse is also the devil
- never fall in love b/c your lover will die or you will hang yourself congrats
- never dally if you’re in love or engaged someone will end up dead
- your siblings hate you except for when they don’t
- the harp was made of her sister’s drowned bones and the strings of her hair
- the bird is your dead brother
- never follow the animals
- always follow the animals
- DEAD PEOPLE THO
- NEVER HAVE A LOVER OMFG
- fucking fairies also jesus christ
- “Part not ye true love, you rich men then, or ne’er her heart shall beat again”
- dont elope on horseback at midnight he’s lying and he’s gonna try to kill you
- peasant lovers will die and take you to hell with them, knight fiancees will take your money and virginity and leave you in a wood hm just become a lesbian jesus christ
- do not i repeat DO NOT AWAY TO CARTERHAUGH AND PLUCK THE TWA ROSE
- but if you do make damn sure you want the d
that’s it that’s it really then you just reread all of the child ballad transcripts a dozen times and drink yourself into a stupor cheers
also for the lOVE OF GOD DON’T HAVE SEX WITH NAMELESS STRANGERS IN THE WOODS THERE IS A 98% CHANCE THEY ARE YOUR LONG-LOST SIBLING
and your lover might be dead after seven years but then again they might be the devil instead; take ur chances
the-lonely-scottish-guy:
‘stop being overdramatic’ they say
‘i dont know what you mean’ i say as i descend from the ceiling, surrounded by mist